The Sporting Life

silence isn't golden anymore

2009-06-20T13:29:00.000-07:00

high.

hu eye. hello.
hi. hel low.

low.

ME: why can't we just openly talk about sex? i tried to when i was 6 and got in trouble.
J : because it could lead to problems.
ME: is sex a problem?
J: yes it could be.
ME: why make-up the stork story? "yes children, the stork carries the baby to the doorstep and that's how babies get here!"
can't we just be honest? can't we tell the little kids what happens?
J: there were some kids i used to babysit when i was 14. they were from a good lds family. well there parents weren't hidding anything from them.
ME: you mean they told them all about sex?
J: yes. they knew all about it. and they'd come to me and say, "we know how babies are made!!! hee hee hee." they'd laugh about it.
ME: maybe it won't be such a silly thing if we just talked about it normally. we wouldn't really care about it.

ME: do you think children will want to have sex if they hear about it?
J: yes, they might. you know this reminds me of my friend jan hokinson who wrote a book about when she was a little girl there was a boy who knew about sex and tried to play doctor with her so he could take off her clothes.
ME: what happened?
J: well i guess she got naked and had a bad feeling about it. he was sick in the head!!

i got ^^^^^high^^^^^^^^^ writting this letter to you

fill _______________ me in on your thoughts..

amen.

2009-05-30T15:24:00.000-07:00

kitty warhol

2009-04-26T15:25:00.000-07:00

the way drew drew

2009-02-26T10:52:00.000-08:00

i got to record a little song with drew danburry. what-what! i feel like the luckiest duckling in the botany pond. guess which cover song? guess.

take a listen please. merci.

http://hypem.com/search/hillery%20hathaway/1/

cute little xylophones

2009-02-05T11:25:00.000-08:00

i wouldn't like me if i met me

2009-01-07T21:04:00.001-08:00

can't stop

2008-12-07T23:03:00.001-08:00

ooh la la

2008-11-30T16:37:00.000-08:00

i had a little photoshoot with this fine young fellow. my alec! here are some favorites.

<3

2008-11-24T08:42:00.001-08:00

clever

2008-11-15T09:51:00.000-08:00

the tide is high

2008-10-27T17:34:00.000-07:00

blondie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

drew danburry, i love you.

2008-09-16T20:05:00.000-07:00

Lynette I Love You:

When I was three, you came to me
You had a popsicle with two sticks
So we could split right down the middle
You were my friend, and I to you
And you taught me how to share between us two

I was 22, I picked up the guitar
I thought it would be a good way to share things from my heart
I traveled 'round, I made some friends
Who give to me because I give something to them
We don't have much, but it's enough
For us to be happy

Recently, she came to me
To share her time and love 'cause she believes
Though we don't have much, it is enough
To stick together when life gets real tough
Her name's Lynette and I'm in love
La-la-la-lovely

urban dictionary makes me want to renew my uta bus pass

2008-09-08T10:38:00.000-07:00

Bus Surfing:

"the act of attempting to ride a bus by standing in the aisle like a surfer. the goal is to stand for as long as possible without touching anything (seats, poles, people) for support.

often a competition between two people to see who can stand the longest."

tell me why!

2008-08-17T20:46:00.000-07:00

ain't nothin' but a heart ache. tell me why! ain't nothin' but a mistake. tell me why! i never wanna hear you say...i want it that way!
-the backstreet boys

aren't they totally kewl?! like OMG.

actually what i wanted to say is....why the h-e-double hockey sticks did i find two 3 liter bottles of shasta in the laundry hamper? this was at my parent's house by the way, where i intend to move back next week. we're gonna have lots of blog worthy material again. dang right!

tee hee

2008-08-06T10:41:00.001-07:00

kings of leon. get it?

omg

2008-07-13T22:56:00.001-07:00

my dad made a myspace so he could read david artchuleta blogs and whatever. totally weird!

proof: http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=389983145

newsflash!

2008-07-12T11:18:00.001-07:00

amy butchered her hairs! doesn't she look stunning?

oh and, we're b-b-b-b-bad to the bone. scandals in our swimming suits. oh my! we will not flash you! sick.

confession part III

2008-07-05T18:29:00.000-07:00

ashlee simpson's new song, "outta my head"...pretty groovy. sorry. i had to say it.

confession part II

2008-07-01T12:34:00.000-07:00

i kinda love this video.

confession I

2008-07-01T11:58:00.000-07:00

i have a crush on the lead singer (brendon urie) of panic! at the disco.

let's play a little game! can you find him? one point for every correct answer. don't 'panic!' the answers are located below each picture! good luck.

1)
(answer: on far left)

2)
(answer: green hoodie)

3)
(answer: on far left)

what's your score?

sunset boulevard

2008-06-19T11:38:00.000-07:00

growing pains

2008-05-28T17:34:00.000-07:00

i think i have them! ouchie ouchie oucherz.

tatted up!

2008-05-19T15:56:00.000-07:00

on my birthday! go go go, shorty! thanks julie bell for the wonderful fake sleeve. hardcore! now i really look like a 20 year old.

this s*** is bananas, b-a-n-a-n-a-s!!

2008-05-15T14:07:00.000-07:00

click here.

http://www.ae.com/web/77e/music/festival.jsp

do you seen 'elizabethan report' on the list....dang right!
my band is playing with bob dylan, spoon, gnarls barkley, the roots, the raconteurs!!
can i get a what what?

this is my friend jeremy.

2008-05-12T22:01:00.000-07:00

i really would like for him to play saxaphone at the stadium of fire. with hannah montana.

you will pee

2008-05-05T18:34:00.001-07:00

your pants. oh yeahhhhh!

hillery the harlot

2008-04-21T13:35:00.000-07:00

sunday evening i was on my way to meet up with da boyz, patrick and jeremy, at farier middle school for a bike ride. while passing 'los hermanos' restaurant i saw a homeless woman. "hi!" i said. "SLUT!!!" she replied. i was wearing a fur hooded winter coat. could that have lead her to believe i slept around??

sorry no picture for this one guys/gals. i wouldn't find anything racy in a google image search for 'slut'. right?

tres trees.

2008-03-31T15:39:00.000-07:00

trees. they're everywhere right? just can't get enough.

once i was in a commercial

2008-03-17T17:47:00.000-07:00

serious. and it didn't win. oh well. at least we get to smile because tony looks like stud muffin in leather pants. amen.

who wants to sleep with me?

2008-03-09T19:59:00.000-07:00

i kick
i punch
i cuddle

joke

2008-02-15T11:04:00.000-08:00

question: how did darth vader know what luke was getting for christmas?

answer: he felt his presents (presence)

bad-a these days

2008-02-06T08:39:00.000-08:00

all i did was put my hands on the train tracks! and that train ran 'em over! it kinda sorta hurts. but i'm tough. let's just say i'm in 'train'ing.

okay. totally psyched you! it's tye-dye!

2008-02-05T17:20:00.000-08:00

5 things on my to do list today:

1) sushi
2) matt shurtleff's art exhibit
3) math homeworks
4) get to bed early (midnight or earlier)
5) read an uplifting talk/scriptures

5 snacks i enjoy:

1) goldfish crackers
2) berries-blackberries/cherries/raspberries
3) lime tortilla chips and salsa
4) pitas and hummus
5) chocolate chip cookies

what i'd do with a billion dollars:

1) i wouldn't accept a billion dollars. i'm happy with what i have. sincerely.

3 bad habbits:

1) staying up late
2) i get easily attached to people
3) i'm usually pretty unmotivated

5 places i have lived:

1) the pre-mortal existance
2) marshfield, wi
3) greenville, nc
4) provolone, ut
5) england in the future? fingers crossed.

5 jobs i've had:

1) tending babies and kiddies
2) pita pit
3) india garden
4) celebrations (wedding planner assistant-catering, serving, floral arranging, decorating)
5) dr. daddy hathaway's office

5 things most people don't know:

1) i can ride a unicycle
2) i can touch my nose with my tounge
3) i can impersonate britney spears (singing) and mandy moore (talking)
4) i love the smell of skunks. not joshing you at all.
5) i can't gain weight. boo.

bye bye.

2008-02-03T21:33:00.000-08:00

today i got to play one of my favourite games, scattergories. it is especially delightful when playing with mother. here's why.

QUESTIONS

#1) footwear- starts with the letter 'g':

mum: "GIANT"
hillery: "is that a brand?"

#2) magazines- 'g':

mum: "GUYS"
hillery: "i'm suprised you didn't write,'girl, american' (my mom is famous for using a comma (,) so she can get points- yes, technically cheating- the letter would have to be 'a'- american girl magazine)."
mum: "well i was going to put,'GIRLS'.

#3) items in a suitcase- 'g':

mum: "G0-GURT"
hillery: "can you refrigerate yogurt in a suitcase?"

#4) beers/wine- letter 'j':

mum: "JOOT BEER."
hillery: "uhhhh...what is joot beer?"
mum: "well it rhymes with root. i thought it was pretty clever of me."

enchanted, i am, by you.

2008-02-02T10:07:00.000-08:00

terrible horrible no good very bad day

2008-01-29T20:01:00.001-08:00

the following things were accomplished today:

a) smashing/trapping 2 coworkers inside the chart closet. (..sleep deprivation)

b) telling a health insurance lady over the phone that my father's name was dr. hillery hathaway (..sleep deprivation)

c) rejected by the institute parkinging machine. i call for them to open the gate:

sir: "why isn't it letting you in?"
me: " i just opened the gate five seconds ago, and i have my key card."
sir: "oh hum. well have have it opened for you."

2 minutes later and there are 4 cars behind me, nearly blocking traffic on the main campus drive...

i call again:

me: "hi not trying to be a nuissance...but i have like four cars behind me. could you please open the gate?"
sir: "ohhh? is that right......" and hangs up on me!

5 minutes later....making folks real real real angry.

i call again:

me: "i'm sorry but i really need this gate to open. there are 4 cars behind me..."
sir #2...who turns out to be my institute teacher, " ohhhh, i'm sorry. i'll open it! that other guy hung up on you..."

i need to get me some sleepy sleep.

calling all crazies

2008-01-03T12:01:00.000-08:00

yesterday at work a large-eyed, 60 year old woman came in and asked for a job. because of a former secretary's passing away we are looking for someone. when asked if she had any previous experience working in the medical field she replied, "I WORKED WITH EXPLOSIVES FOR 19 YEARS!" Just what we need. A bomber.

january 1st 2008

2008-01-01T14:38:00.000-08:00

just hanging out at my parent's house and oddly enough i can hear a mysterious trumpet player and an obnoxious duck quacking on the front lawn. i can hear it! what in tarnation is going on?

oh happy new year.

remember?

2007-12-29T18:28:00.000-08:00

i'd like

2007-12-24T00:30:00.000-08:00

to be a good-doer like amelie.

and eat raspberries off the tops of my ten fingers.

frenchy i'm faking

2007-12-17T16:47:00.000-08:00

3 people as of recent have asked, "is that your real hair? it looks like a wig! it's just so perfect."

you wanna see a wig? here i'll show you..

like woah

2007-12-16T11:34:00.000-08:00

this one time on our family vacation we brought home...!!

ho ho ho ha

2007-12-14T11:56:00.000-08:00

sooooooo funny.

turn yo self into an elf!

this is me, my sissy heather, bro bro ben, and other sis heidi.

http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1399555539

dear mysterious lover

2007-12-13T22:34:00.000-08:00

thank you for putting that beautiful pinecone in my bicycle basket yesterday.

do you live in a tree? could i hold you in my hands and nuzzle your head? let's eat mixed nuts on christmas.
or we could pick insects off of plants together. whichever. both sound delightful.

love, hillery

fiddy cent

2007-12-07T19:23:00.001-08:00

dats right dazzzz riiiiiight. someone found 2 lovely quarters on the uta bus floor. and it was me.

i'm telling you! has anybody ever offered you money to ride with them? and don't say a stranger that wanted to kidnap you. you're a big fat fibber.

oh and this picture i found of '50 cent' doesn't look anything like the rapper. whatever.

apology

2007-11-26T20:18:00.000-08:00

dear dear friends of the blogging world,

wow, i haven't written in years? decades? a century? okay that was a lie. but seriously. where have i been?

oh yes, now i remember...another grand adventure on the good 'ol uta bus today.

the following things were witnessed:

1) a thirteen year old grandmother/barbie. i'm not sure how to explain this really, just imagine a 70 year old woman with long plastic looking hair and makeup like barbie, wearing flared jeans and some skater shoes.

2) a tired lad? first, bam! he smacks into a pole while exiting out the doors. then best of all, his backpack strap gets caught on the side railing just beside the door. the bus driver starts the engines and moves about 2 feet. finally mr. space cadet with the backpack becomes alert and yells, "OHHH! OHHH! WAIT! WAIT! HEY!"

man, today wasn't half as bad as i expected.

gimme the birdie!

2007-10-02T02:29:00.000-07:00

oh don't even try sticking your middle finger up at me! that's not what i meant! duhhhhh.

let's just lay it out on the line that macaws are the bomb!

i finally got to have an encounter with one at the hare krishna temple!

here are a few things that were said by this creature:

1) i approach the bird cage...me: "hi baby!" macaw: "MOVE IT!"
2) the macaw bobbed his head up and down saying, "Peek-a-boo!"
3) he even said "helloooo!" and "bye!"

christmas is coming up and i've certainly been a well-behaved child! please....?!

i spy hillery?

2007-08-24T13:23:00.000-07:00

http://www.thebeehivestate.blogspot.com

and

http://www.slcpomp.com

ready

set

go!

love love love

2007-08-20T17:14:00.000-07:00

this band.

they're mew.

AWESOME!

busted!

2007-08-08T12:57:00.000-07:00

look who was caught using photobooth...

mr. b!

i know

2007-07-27T16:12:00.000-07:00

i crossed the plains with my wagon
my bonnet tied tightly round my head
the bitter cold
i fought the storm
i found my home
i was a pioneer

2007-07-16T12:44:00.001-07:00

fsdlfjie8435y74andjbnjkxbvjkdfhgkljakfkjalrefiahifkf.
sfdksjfdkjisehuertweiurywieuyriuwyeriuy23984y923oiu3ijf.

oh sorry. were you expecting something intelligent to come out of this mouth?

naked!

2007-07-11T10:24:00.000-07:00

why do some folks say the word naked like, 'neck-ed'? how do you get that? neck-ed. neck-kid. neq-id. those are some alternate spellings.

oh and why, you might ask is this is on my mind? it's just the usual people! dreaming of naked mole rats. here's a picture to prove it.

and while we're on the subject of 'naked' let's just get the message across that 'naked juice' is basically divinity from above. yumyumyum.

byebye.

2007-07-08T13:29:00.000-07:00

i'm pretty sure this is not even a joke. cool!

a non-cheesy suggestion

2007-06-19T07:29:00.000-07:00

let's all just quit our jobs and fly to the moon! i'm not even kidding here people!

hello, we could live there for as long as we want!

we could eat cheese! and sell it too!

are you coming or what?

my musical nose

2007-06-08T14:54:00.000-07:00

last night in my dream i was playing saxophone sounds out of my nostrils. naturally. and everybody was jealous.

what if this were real?? c'mon guys. pretty cool!

another tragedy

2007-05-31T17:57:00.001-07:00

my hairdryer and flat iron offically lost their lives. funeral anyone? we could listen to 'the blow' and 'hot hot heat'.

irony with a coke, please.

2007-05-29T17:00:00.000-07:00

today at the san diego zoo this little thought crossed my mind...the majority of what is sold in their little concession stands and outdoor cafes is meat! almost every menu item is carnivor friendly. what the dickens! is this not ironic or immoral? the zoo! a place to appreciate animals? no? am i mistaken?

building a mystery

2007-05-25T10:19:00.001-07:00

i've got one question...what is it that everybody has and some pirates and theives try to take?

gone daddy gone

2007-05-16T18:10:00.000-07:00

carl withers my beloved son (betta fish) passed away today. 3 days before my birthday! not the birthday surprise i was desiring. betta' recognize! get it? betta' like betta fish?

elleroy and i had a funeral. for pre-funeral services we listened to songs like, "last goodbye" by(e) jeff buckley, "bye" by(e) elliott smith, and "this is the last time" by(e) keane. and the grand finale theme song of our little grieving session was "the funeral" by(e) band of horses. we also wrote poems and read them aloud to our dear sweet boy.

the highlight was probably the part when we clogged our drain. not with the fish! oh boy! don't worry! it was just with toilet paper! yes. you heard right.

we needed a spot in the house to strain the remaining contents of the fish bowl. there were purple gems in carl's abode that we didn't want flying down the drain. neither ellie or myself were willing to sacrifice our towels or strainer for the experiment. the both of us came up with the beyond genius idea of putting the t.p. ( secret code for toilet paper ) over the drain. but it actually flaked to itty bitty pieces. and thus the outcome- a congested sink.

yeah, so what? we're hardcore like that!

we had no draino and therefore our only thrifty/uncostly/cheap skate way was to go door-to-door asking. and we officially succeeded! thanks to the very generous lads- aaron van wagoner and friend andrew.

oh and we're definitely getting a new fish. soon. watch out for carl(s) jr.! get it? not the restraunt.

p.s. how many ( ) (parenthesis) did i use? guess the number and win a free box of broken crayons! this is me being serious!

p.p.s. aurora thinks he has a generous looking face. and it turns out i falsely rewarded him for draino because in actuality it's andrew's draino. ohhhh shucks. give those cookies back you little fooler!

this may be a bit fishy

2007-05-09T22:20:00.000-07:00

"i'd take my puppy everywhere, la la la la i wouldn't care. then we'll stay away from crowds with signs that say no dogs allowed. oh we...i know he'd never bite me!" lyrics by harry nilsson, 'the puppy song'

i was thinking about this tender tune today. if you haven't heard the recent pet update in my life elleroy and i decided to adopt a beta fish. he is purple (like our bedroom walls! not intentional. no way.) and he goes by the name of carl withers.

so what if i took my dear pet with me everywhere i went? would it be socially acceptable to do this? if people can show off their puppies in public why can't i bring my fish to the movie theater? the pool? to the dentist? to church? (okay maybe no).

i think i will!

i believe i can fly

2007-04-30T14:49:00.000-07:00

my ears did hear glorious music this morn. a bird who's chirp was that of a broken record. it struggled. greatly.

i love you dear bird.

also, who doesn't like r. kelly? your mom?

eye m 12345678910u! (get it?)

2007-04-23T22:43:00.000-07:00

what if we all started using the phrase, "boom shaka laka laka" a bit more? will we do it?

i'm counting on you! this was the title i made into a mystery joke. funny or not funny?

p.s. my fathor just left a 3 pound slab of costco butter (now mushy) behind the telephone and next to various junk items from the kitchen. (dried up markers, flashlight, cords to who knows what, piles of old mail, etc) funny or not funny?

popping the question (questioning pop-music)

2007-04-21T21:25:00.000-07:00

has anybody ever heard of pop sensation jojo? yes, she is in the hit film aquamarine. yes, she is like 14. yes, she sings horrible teenybopper music.

now one good thing that comes from having a 16 year old brother is that he'll put appalling crap on itunes. and in this case, it does include jojo. one of her songs came up on random play-the song, "too little too late." and about 12 seconds into the song (right before i hit next) she says, "come with me, stay the night." wait. what? you're 14? you wrote this?

ohhhhh like a sleepover party!

oops! he did it again.

2007-04-20T13:48:00.000-07:00

those of you who are familiar with the tale of my father and his 'putting things in the freezer' issues i have good news for you! (read my first blog on december 24th if you're lost) there is a short sequel to add on to this! whoo! alright-yeah...uh huh.

today i was craving the remnants of my oreo cheesecake shake. which was put in the.....freezer. yep, you guessed it. you genius. but to my dismay i could not find it! and when i looked up above my head i saw something. this something was sitting on top of the freezer. what oh what could it be?

my shake! completely melted. which means mr. b (my dadio) left it out overnight? again!

because i know this incident will occur again. probably soon. probably tomorrow. i will just say, to be continued....

why i heart my mummy

2007-04-19T13:36:00.001-07:00

mum: "hillery, why is the c-a-t in the house?" shhhhhh, the c-a-t might hear you saying it's name!

mum talking to binford our male dog."hi mister binford daisy!" daisy is our female dog.

turning left at a four-way stop. mum (counting quickly): "1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10!!!" me:"why are you counting?" mum: "oh for fun!"

mum (screaming bloody murder): "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" me (running to see what's going down in the backyard):"what, what's the matter!" mum: "there's a dead bird on the lawn! ohhhhhhh. i don't want to pick it up!" mum grabs a plastic grocery bag. and while carefully scooping up the carcass says to herself, "go janice! go janice! go janice go! you can do it janice!"

i hope that this video isn't completely related to drugs

2007-04-18T18:28:00.000-07:00

cause it's beyond lovely. don't believe me? ask the dishes!

discovery

2007-04-17T14:27:00.000-07:00

discovery #1: today at costco i asked my mother if she would buy me a hot tub. guess what?! she said no.

discovery #2: my five year old neighbor mckenna sells sandwhich bags of candy for 10 cents! cheap!

discovery #3: in the state of utah, birds have the right of way on all highways.

thoughts of marriage

2007-04-16T19:48:00.000-07:00

by this title you would expect me to announce a recent proposal or a tender engagement story. you are unfortunately and sorely confused. you see, i'm looking for a husband with an exceptionally cool last name. right now. this is not a joke. here's what i've come up with thus far.

prefered last names:

1) walker- i would name my son jay. (jay walker)
2) rexic- i would name my daughter anna. (anna rexic)
3) tial- i would name my daughter celest. (celest tial)
4) bed- i would name my son goto. (goto bed)
5) showers- i would name my daughter april. (april showers)
6) oli- i would name my daughter ravi. (ravi oli)

find me a husband! quick!

the future looks good

2007-04-15T23:40:00.000-07:00

i hope, wish, and pray i look like this my whole life. that's all.

p.s. someone make me do my homework. pleeeeeease.

these are a few of my favourite things.

2007-04-15T18:17:00.000-07:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

uta- ultra trendy automobile

2007-04-14T19:48:00.001-07:00

some of you may enjoy riding your scooters, rollerblades, jumping in your moonboots to school. but me? well i take the bus. as of today. let me tell you folks, it was indeed one wild ride. my reasoning: bus #1: i sit next to a fellow. he's a 1 out of 10 on the attractiveness scale and completely opposite of my style. as a stereotype we'll just call him minkus the nerd. this was one of those moments when you're in dire need of a mute button. he rambled on and on and on and on about how he's terrible at mathematics and how he adored science.

look at me sonny? do i honestly give a rats tail? i politely smiled and avoided continuation of conversation.

you think this is bad? nooooooo. oh no.

the next stop in front of deseret industries a rather frumpy, black-clothed lady hops on the bus. let's call her henrietta. approximately five seconds after she sits down she says to this chap (we'll give him the name louis)-about 40 years old, beside me, note-she doesn't even know him! she's all like, "hey, you like to check girls out at every bus stop." louis says, "no, no, i don't." henrietta's all, "oh yes, at every bus station you stare at all the girls. behind your wife's back! you've probably been videotaped!" and he's like, "i'm not even married! i don't do that stuff!" henrietta laughs, "oh yeah right!" and the bus driver shouts, "hey cut it out! now!"

silence for about 1 minute. next bus stop over by blockbuster video a hispanic lady in her 30's sits in front of henrietta. she'll probably need a name too. let's call her juanita. and apparently juanita knows the bus driver and is having a conversation with her about how she took her car to get fixed at the car dealership and how they didn't clean it up properly.

about 2 minutes into the conversation henrietta yells, "oh shut up! nobody cares about your f***ing problems! nobody cares about your f***ing problems." juanita says, "excuse me! excuse me! i can talk to the bus driver if i want! and look at you! you're eating food on the bus! see that sign over there? it says 'no food'!"

the bus driver says, "ohhhhh. you better not be eating food on the bus!" henrietta quickly puts her food away. the bus driver says, "hey lady, what's your name anyway. i'm going to report you." henrietta shouts, "i don't have to tell you my f***ing name! make me!"

next stop is the university mall. henrietta is forced to take herself and belongings off the bus. the bus driver and louis follow off. all of us passengers are completely shocked. we fill out some complaint cards. about 5 minutes later louis comes back, then following behind, the bus driver. henrietta runs back up to the doors nearly punches the bus driver-but she closed the doors just in time. and henrietta walks towards the mall still looking at bus 830 shouting every swear word in the book.

and a uta bus lady says, "anybody going to uvsc get on the 811" so here we go to the other bus. bus #2. and! minkus is sitting behind me. woo hoo! breathing on the back of my neck. eeeeeeeek. and then a handicapped lady on this bus is shouting at the bus driver because she wants to get off in the middle of a shopping center (not on the bus route) and the driver says, "i'll let you out just past this stop light, okay?" and the crazy lady's all, "nooooo! now! i'm handicapped and this is how you treat me! i'm reporting you!" and the driver pulls over at the next stop and crazy lady's like, "this is where you were talking about? oh! this is great! i'm sorry! thank you, thank you kindly!"

today was awesome.

that was the worst christmas ever!

2006-12-25T12:05:00.000-08:00

sufjan says it best, "that was the worst christmas ever!"

1) my parental units hand heather, heidi, and myself these rather large presents. what oh what could they be?! we're supposed to open them at the same time, but before we do my mother says, "now, this probably won't mean anything now, but in the future you might enjoy it." "ummmm....what on earth does that mean mother?" i say. now we're getting all curious and open the presents! and behold! we each get a garbage bag full of baby blankets, bibs, a baby doll, i haven't quite observed it fully. but anyway most importantly i get a ballerina doll! gasp! mother says, "hillery got the ballerina!" oh boy! oh and it was also filled with items for a future mother's kitchen like oven mits, spatchula, and measuring cups. thanks mom!.....? basically i take this as, hurry and get a boyfriend then hop on the marriage train, asap! then have kids! so we can have grandbabies! for my mother's last birthday her birthday wish was for grandchildren...honest.

2) the family present! now thankfully it wasn't a moving waterfall picture, cause that's what we got last year. not just 1, but 2! oh dear me. anyway the tag on the present this year says, "to the hathaway's who are hard as steel. follow the iron rod. love, santa" santa quotes the book of mormon? and inside was, "'steel' magnolias" on dvd.

3) heidi, my sister recieves a reconstructed/used clarinet! heidi last played/touched the clarinet i believe in the years of her youth when she was a lass in middle school. she's 25 now...so....she really wanted one, i'm guessing. and my parents gave her some sweet books like, "elementary clarinet solos". "heidi, this is your main gift!" my parents assure her.

4) heidi gets an empty box for christmas. mum says, "it was for your birthday! she wanted to use her boots for her birthday (dec. 18th). i'm just reminding you!".....awful. i know.

5) and of course, we all get these wretched and a half christmas socks from the dollar store. gag.

i adore my parents but i tend to think they lack in the good gift giving ideas department.

over and out. and merry merry christmas!

Fairly Odd Parent

2006-12-24T20:05:00.000-08:00

First blog ever on www.blogger.com! Wooooo hoooo! Cow-a-bunga! Now, If I am correct, "Fairly Odd Parents" is a show on the telly. And if I am correct, I do believe I have one of those. Check yes, one telly. Double check yes, one fairly odd parent. Truly, no wait, I lied....two actually. My dear sweet mother is a bit of an oddball. Don't believe me? Ask the dishes. Cause the dishes don't lie! Ya heard! Perhaps I'll share some goodie tales about her in a future upcoming blog! Anyway this 'fairly odd parent' I'm speaking of today happens to be the one and only 'Mr. B'! Yeah! You know! 'B' stands for Bruce who is my father! Okay, so this christmas eve morning as I'm half asleep in my bedroom upstairs....note: our walls are paper-thin and you can basically hear people talking in the basement! Nahhh, stjk! (stjk=so totally just kidding. What now?! I'm in 5th grade! Sucka!) But anyway, you're catching my drift...So I'm lying there and I do declare hearin' my momma shout, "Bruce! You did it again! How many times do I have to tell you to not leave the icecream on top of the freezer!?" Did I mention he left the icecream just hanging out on top of the fridge the entire night? Yep, that's what I call awesome! My dad has done this in past times with items that belong in the fridge. Don't get me wrong, he's a great pianist, rock collecter, etc...but he does indeed have a reputation for mistaking items in the wrong places. Kind of bad news. Doo da doo, 8 'o clock pm rolls around today and for the second time my father has failed to put the evening snack called icecream back in the chilled storage for preservation aka freezer! Mother says, "Bruce! You can't put the icecream on top of the freezer! We put it inside the freezer." Isn't it great that my father needs a simple instruction like, 'We put icecream in freezers'? Next we'll probably have to inform him that letters go in the mailbox. Oh geez! My family rocks like the boy band Hanson. Except maybe 10 times more rockin'. As Death Cab would say, this is"Why you'd want to live here." Any takers?